Trash Talk

“Have you ever been to Michigan? The whole state smells like hot dog water. It’s horrifying!” - OSU grad

Tate Forcier Meet Thaddeus Gibson

"I am going to get (my teammates) to a bowl game. If it means spending 10 hours in film this week, then I am going to do it. But we are going to get them to a bowl game." - Tate Forcier, Michigan freshman QB

The above happens for the 5-6 Wolverines if they beat Ohio State this weekend in Ann Arbor. Good luck.

Um, just don't tell the NCAA about all those extra hours in the film room. Tate, how did you like Thaddeus Gibson in all that film-watchin'?

Michigan Week

Mizzou fans hate Kansas and vice versa. The hate runs deep between these two schools. The rivalry dates all the way back to the Civil War era.

Now, imagine if both schools had football teams that were 100 times better than they currently are. Or that Mizzou was as good as Kansas in hoops (every year, not just last year). Then imagine a history of the conference title always coming down to their one game in late November, often with national implications.

Again, multiply all that by 1000 and you might get somewhere near the Ohio State-Michigan rivalry. This game is largely acknowledged as the greatest rivalry in all of sports. It doesn't get any bigger than this. And all of this fuss over Toledo? You better believe it.

This is the biggest week of sport for me as a Buckeye fan. It's bigger than the Super Bowl. I can deal with the big game flops of the past couple of years as long as my team beats that school up north.

Luckily, we are currently in an era of ascendancy for The Ohio State University in this rivalry game. Ohio State Coach Jim Tressel has won seven of eight of these games. He owned Lloyd Carr and last year PWNED Rich Rodriguez to the tune of 42-7. So, The Game has been good to me lately.

I apologize ahead of time for all the college football posts coming this week, but I can't seem to help it. I toned it down this season after writing about Ohio State all through last season. This week is different. Ohio State is going to the Rose Bowl no matter what happens on Saturday in Ann Arbor, but it will all be for nothing if they don't beat the Wolverines. I'm not kidding. Ask John Cooper.

You enjoy your Mizzou Tigers, COMO-ians. I'm a Buckeye and this is Michigan Week. Nothing else really matters beyond that.

Live Blogging: The Game, The Second Half

12:52
Lucia's asleep, but I'm keeping an ear on her.

Halftime thoughts: Michigan's defense is stout. It's too bad for them that their offense has been so erratic all year. They could have won some more games this year had the offense scored a few points.

Ohio State will need to open things up a bit, get Pryor rolling out of the pocket. Overall, I'm not worried. I realize Michigan is playing maybe its best game of the season, but there's no way they will be able to keep up.

My biggest worry is my bet with GE. It will be tough for Ohio State to win this one by 19+. We'll see.

12:56
I didn't miss this kickoff. Who cares where Paul McGuire is?

1:02
All we need are a few more 42-yard runs by Beanie. Flipped the field. Woo-hoo!

1:03
Or a 49-yarder by Herron for a touchdown! This is quintessential Tressel-ball. When Tressel is on his game, he always makes good adjustments at halftime...especially versus Michigan. 21-7. All we need is one more TD and shutout Michigan the rest of the way. Then I win the bet.

1:10
James "The Little Animal" Laurinaitis' mom is named Lora...Lora Laurinaitis. You can't make this stuff up.

Shit! Roughing the punter on Ohio State.

1:17
Beanie left the game. That sucks. He is one of my current crushes. More on that in a future post.

Just refilled my water glass. No beer today, even though I just loaded up for Genocide Celebration DayTM. I bought so much beer that I'm a little embarrassed to report how much I spent. This time of year is rough on the bank accounts of beer drinkers (not sure that I rate as "beer nerd" just yet). All the breweries release all these special brews for the holidays. There's just so much from which to choose and so little time.

1:21
Lucia's waking. I've got to hurry!

1:25
Left to get the baby and a bottle. Returned to see Ray Small make an 80+yard punt return. I'm happy for that kid. He was suspended for two weeks for skipping classes. I'm glad to see him back and contributing.

1:26
Pryor, Robiskie: touchdown. That's 28-7, GE.

1:33
Had to step away for the baby. Returned to see Pryor's biggest, best play of the day and Boom Herron running close to the goal line.

1:38
Looking at a possible interception in the end zone. I need this to be incomplete for the bet.

1:41
The call goes our way. Herron scores. 35-7. I'll start looking for an OSU pic for GE to post.

Lu's just chillin', watching The Game. Look below.


Hummer commercial: Why are they still selling Hummers? Hasn't anyone figured out that they are no good for the environment, the wallet, or everyone else's safety? Of course, the fact that they're playing the ad during the football game tells you the level of sophistication of the audience. What does that say about me?

1:45
Fumble on the kickoff! This is about to get ugly. This is for all those Cooper years. I'd love for Ohio State to put fifty on the board, but 42 should do the trick. This won't erase Desmond Howard's Heisman pose or Tim Biakabutuka, but it will help.

Todd Boeckman's in! About three ineffective games into the season, Boeckman was replaced by freshman Terrelle Pryor. It was a good move. Pryor is more mobile and is actually cooler in the pocket than Boeckman. Sure, Boeckman was all-Big Ten, a senior captain, and led the Buckeyes to the BCS championship game, but he has been terribly ineffective for a while now. Pryor's the future, gives Ohio State its best chance to win, and has just played better.

1:47
Touchdown! The TD actually calms the baby for a moment.

1:56
I'm back from a diaper change. Missed some action and still have a cranky baby.

1:58
Here goes Griese again. He's such an ass. It's been seven or eight games since the quarterback change and he's still harping on it. Give it a rest. Michigan's getting whipped. Apparently Tressel made one good decision this year.

2:09
This thing is winding down: 42-7. The announcers are talking about dancing with the stars and gold pants. Again, Griese with the snide comments. He doesn't get it. How long has he covered this game? I would think a college football analyst covering the sport's greatest rivalry would be aware of one of the traditions. My friends, that's what you call a Google.

2:11
Laraunitis earns player of the game with his 11 tackles and some ridiculously vicious hits. Actually, for as fired up as Michigan acted before and at the beginning of the game, they were certainly out hit the entire afternoon.

2:14
Five in a row. Tress is 7-1. Buckeyes go 10-2. Now we wait and see if Michigan State can beat Penn State, giving OSU a shot at the Rose Bowl.

Here's an image for GE to post on his blog...


Or this will do...

Either way, go buy GE's book. I honestly haven't read it, but it's on my list. Look for at least one more person to buy your book this week, GE.

Live Blogging: The Game

10:45 CST
Just chillin' and waiting for kickoff. I wonder if Lucia will be able to keep up her good mood so that I miss very little of the game?

10:49 CST
Michigan looks a little frisky. The teams met at mid-field for some jawing...of course, Michigan forgot to play offense the last time this happened. We'll see.

10:55 CST
Herbie and Corso both pick tOSU big. I have to use the bathroom now.

11:03 CST
Read some of the year-end issue of Paste while in the bathroom. Interesting list. I may have to check out the Nick Cave release. I've heard a lot of good things about it. I'll comment on some of the other selections as the game moves on.

I am already tired of hearing how the records don't matter in this rivalry...except that neither team ever comes in with 8 losses like Michigan does today. Really. This Michigan team is not very good. In this case, records do matter.

11:11
Missed kickoff because I had to move the baby's swing to her nursery. Argh.

11:13
I would be swearing up a storm right now if I wasn't blogging. F-ing Pryor threw a pick! Also, I'm jittery from too much coffee.

11:17
Defense holds. Michigan gets nothing. What? Now I'm super jittery.

Paste placed Mates of State at #24 on their list. Why? Apparently they read boring and married as maturing. Whatev.

Ooh, Lost is coming back! What are they gonna do now that everybody's off the island? I realize not everyone left the island, but all the best characters (sans those who died) have left. It should be interesting. When does it begin again? Like February? Great. That's two months of hype only to be let down by the season premier, causing us to have more questions than ever before. I love that show.



11:35
I am already tired of Bob Griese. He is such a homer. His kid played for Michigan and he always picks on Ohio State. I am done with him. Now Pryor gets sacked again and the Buckeyes send a terrible punt to Michigan. At least the defense showed up today.


11:38
Go Beanie!!! Touchdown! It's about freakin' time. Beanie up the middle for 59 yards. Man, had he not hurt his foot this year, he would have won the Heisman. Oh well. Maybe he'll come back next year.

Back to the Paste list...This is why Paste's music coverage is suspect: They placed mediocre releases by the aforementioned Mates of State, as well as My Morning Jacket, Of Montreal, The Hold Steady, and Girl Talk (I HATE mash-up acts.). Of course, all of these will be on everyone else's lists. So, what do I know?

11:46
Chris Carter (all he ever does is catch touchdowns) is on the Ohio State sideline. I like that he's talking to Ray Small. That kid needs some mentoring, Small that is. I still remember getting Carter's signature at the spring game after he left for the NFL. Carter was declared ineligible after his junior year when he took some money from an agent. He was still the greatest OSU receiver ever.

Lucia has now joined me in time for the second quarter.

11:54
Touchdown! Pryor to Hartline for 53 yards! He missed one like this earlier. I'm glad to see that they went back to it. That's what Michigan gets for stacking up against the run. 14-0, let the route begin.

The baby is cranky. Apparently she doesn't appreciate the greatest rivalry in all of college football. That's OK. She's only 10 weeks old. So I'll round up the Moby and see if R wants to nurse her some more.

12:04
Beanie comes up limping, calls off the replacement, and runs for a first down.

12:07
Hm, Michigan's band actually performed the first ever Script Ohio. That just seems blasphemous now. Of course, it was performed in the 1930's. That was a completely different time in college football. Fans and teams weren't so nasty back then. They were more rah-rah-rah and all that.



12:13
Michigan finally got their first first down of the game with eight minutes left in the half. Their offense is a juggernaught.

12:17
Crap! Michigan has run like the same play eight times this drive and it just landed them inside the five. Timeout. I can go to the bathroom. There goes the shutout.

12:21
It took Michigan four tries, but they got their TD.

I'm holding Lucia. I can't swear.

I want an iPhone. Those ads highlighting the aps have converted me. Oh, and this.


12:29
Nothing that time, Minor. The baby sleeps.

12:34
Halftime. Ohio State finishes with only a 7-point lead and a quarterback sneak. Ho-hum.

Ohio State/Michigan: 0 Days

No words today...

Ohio State/Michigan: 1 Day

“There is one quality which one must possess to win, and that is definiteness of purpose, the knowledge of what one wants, and a burning desire to possess it.” -Napoleon

Link

Ohio State/Michigan: 2 Days

I bet you thought I forgot...

"If you chase perfection, you often catch excellence." -William Fowble

Link

Ohio State/Michigan: 3 Days

"Every great and commanding movement in the annals of the world is due to the triumph of enthusiasm. Nothing great was ever achieved without it." -Ralph Waldo Emerson

Link

Ohio State/Michigan: 4 Days

"My idea of a good hit is when the guy wakes up on the sidelines with train whistles blowing in his head." - Jack Tatum.

Link

Ohio State/Michigan: 5 Days

"The key to winning is poise under stress."-Paul Brown

Link

Ohio State/Michigan: 6 Days

“Paralyze resistance with persistence.” -Woody Hayes

Link