Birthing Story, Part 2

Something changed on the way to the hospital. I don't know whether it was the fear of a medicine-induced C-section or the bumpy car ride, but something in R's condition changed. The contraction pattern and intensity we had been waiting for finally started to kick in.

We entered the hospital's birthing center when R fell to her hands and knees, moaning through the next contraction. Some alarmed folks in the waiting area tried to help by pointing her in the direction of the emergency room. Elizabeth, our doctor, politely informed them that R was in exactly the right place to birth.

After checking in, we hurried down the hall and up the elevator and down another hallway. They assigned us a room with two nurses already prepping the area. A gown was handed to R and she and Erica, the doula, entered the bathroom to change...and continue laboring on the toilet. Already, we were throwing the hospital staff out of their comfort zone.
Throughout the morning, the nurses tried their best to monitor R's vital signs and the baby's heartbeat. Everything was running along smoothly, but they had a hard time monitoring R since she barely spent any time laboring in the bed. Luckily, the nurses were good sports and even acknowledged that we all seemed to know what we were doing.

This happened throughout our time at the hospital. We were able to bend (and sometimes break) the rules at nearly every step. It became clearer and clearer that Elizabeth knew the right people and exactly how to schmooze in order to allow R to labor naturally and spontaneously.

At some point, it was suggested that something be done to move the contractions to the final stage of transition so that R could dilate from 8 centimeters to the necessary 10. The doctor on call suggested a series of interventions, starting from the least intrusive and eventually leading to a possible C-section. The first step was to break R's water and see what happened.

Almost immediately, R began transition. We were told she had two hours before more intrusive measures would be taken (ie drugs). So, to work we went. Erica, Elizabeth, and I did anything we could to assist R.R was the star, though. She had labored for 27 or so hours before coming to the hospital. Now she had to endure the toughest part of labor. Through constant breathing exercises and various positions on and off the bed, R worked through each increasingly intense contraction. She worked so hard that the IV popped from her hand.

Finally, the resident entered the room. If she found that R had progressed significantly (meaning the final 2 centimeters of dilation) then she could begin to push - an urge she had for the previous two hours of labor. If there was no change, the dreaded interventions would begin.

Thankfully, R dilated the final two centimeters. We made many, many adjustments to the bed. The nurse was sent out to look for the birthing bar. (Yes. The hospital only had one birthing bar.) Once she returned with the bar, the nurses put it in backwards. We fixed that, but found it to be wobbly, so Elizabeth somehow held the bar, the heart monitor for the baby, and R's perineum all at the same time.

The pushing began.

The best part of the early pushing was when R would rest her feet up on the bar. To this, the nurse said, "Well, I've never seen it used for that." I questioned whether she had ever seen the bar used at all, but whatever.

Luckily, Elizabeth was permitted to continue to help R through the pushing all the way up to the crowning. The resident stepped in at that moment. They had some "pleasantries" about what would be the best position to push. The resident won out and R laid back.

I have always seen my partner as one of the strongest, most competent people I've ever met. However, nothing she has ever done could ever compare to what she did next. She pushed with such great might, that I could see the muscles in her arms bulge. The amount of adrenaline R had running through her body was absolutely amazing. She is easily the strongest person I know. It was easily the most amazing feat of strength I have ever seen.

Anyway, the pushing continued. We were encouraged to feel the baby's head, which we did. R later told me that it was incentive to keep going. I thought it was a gooey, hairy piece of flesh, but I wasn't passing it through my vagina.

The biggest difference between a hospital birth and a natural/home birth became very apparent at this time. The resident wanted R to push with all her might, like a super woman or some macho crap like that. Meanwhile, Elizabeth and Erica encouraged R to ease her baby out. It was a difference between harvesting the baby and bringing a child into a world where her mother was valued as much as she. Either way, the baby came out.

Lucia was promptly laid on a table. She screamed as soon as her little behind touched the table's surface. I was directed to cut the chord, which I did in a haze. Then, before the baby could be whisked away, R asked me to tell her the sex.

The pressure was on. I had one chance in my life to get this right. I looked, but was confused for a second. I remember that some of the birthing books I read described a baby's genitalia as swollen from all the hormones during birth. When one's bits are swollen the way they are at birth, everything looks like a sack of flesh. I finally snapped to and made the call."It's a girl!"

There was an eruption in the room as I realized several doctors, nurses, students, other community members seem to fill the room. As I turned to congratulate my partner, the nurse called me to follow her. Like a carrot tied to a stick, she led me our of the delivery room into a closet of med students.

Since Lucia was born with meconium in the sack, she had to be checked and cleaned by the pediatrician. So, she and her med students scrubbed the baby and sucked all the meconium from her nasal passages and lungs. She kicked at the students as they tried to get her foot print.

The doctor turned to me for her name. I couldn't speak. As those who were at my wedding could attest, I have a bit of a crying problem in such situations. Once I gathered myself, I was able to verbalize "Lucia."

They handed me my child and I whisked her off to her mother for some bonding and nursing.

Our birthing experience wasn't exactly what we had intended, but it was close. R was able to have a natural, spontaneous birth. The last four hours just took place at the hospital. There's more to the story, but that's the birth.

Now, we have the most beautiful and easy going baby we could have ever wished for in Lucia Caroline.

Birthing Story, Part 1

As mentioned before, Lucia has finally arrived. However, she took her sweet time doing so. She was born about nine days after her official due date. We have recently come to the realization that the process started way before that.

About two weeks before Lucia's arrival, R was feeling some serious contractions. We timed them, but they were erratic in intensity, length, and time between. Eventually, they subsided. So, we waited a little longer. About a week later, they started up again, but again, the contractions faded. R was extremely frustrated. We were ready, but Lucia was not.

In retrospect, these early episodes were actually early labor. We figure that R probably dilated 3-4 centimeters over that two week period.

Then it happened. Around 3:30 AM, Wednesday morning, R was complaining of contractions again. Remembering the two previous false starts, I slowly rolled out of bed to locate my watch and contractions record. R expressed that these contractions were different than the previous two times. So, we moved downstairs to the finished basement where we were planning to birth anyway.

As the contractions became more intense, I noticed that R changed her disposition dramatically. I was no longer able to distract her with simple chit-chat about the presidential race or work or whatever. This was the real deal. As my partner worked through the next contraction, I fought hard to hold back a smile. This was really happening. Cletus was to be a fetus no more.

We made the decision to call the doula, Erica, shortly after 4:00. At one point, she told me to be quiet so that she could listen to R's contraction. She was satisfied that things were in motion. Erica appeared in our basement within a half hour.

The laboring continued and I called the midwife, Kim, who called the doctor (Elizabeth) and the midwife's apprentice. By about 8:00, our team of four (including me) was assembled to help R through this labor. Somewhere around that time, it was established that R was about 8 centimeters dilated. It wouldn't be much longer...or so we thought.
There was a great system in place for this birth. The birthing tub (in a box) was inflated and slowly filling with hot water. Blankets, pillows, cushions, towels, and various other supplies were set up all over the basement to allow several options for laboring.

R labored on all fours, sitting on the birthing ball, lying in our spare bed, and mostly submerged in the tub. We moved her from spot to spot to encourage the contractions. All four of us rotated between running to get supplies, encouraging R, giving massages, or checking her vital signs.

This stage of labor went on for nearly 24 hours. However, R's dilation ceased to progress. Erica assured us that progression still could happen even without increased dilation, but that didn't make it any easier.

R became exhausted. It was increasingly harder to deal with the contractions when little seemed to be happening. The birthing team all had to take food and sleep breaks. All the while, R kept working through contractions.On top of this marathon labor, several concerns arose. First, R's blood pressure was disturbingly high. This was something we dealt with throughout pregnancy, but it seemed to be more a symptom of white coat syndrome than anything serious. As time wore on, it became noticeable that R's contractions slowed and were less intense. R's water hadn't broken, which wasn't strange, but it was getting late in the game. Upon one check by the doctor, Elizabeth discovered that the baby's head was tucked in a strange position. It was doubtful that it would be able to pass unless it was adjusted in time for full dilation. And that brings me to the scariest development: R actually went backwards in her dilation.

All this time, R had worked and worked through her labor with little or no sleep and a tiny amount of food and water. It was enormously frustrating that no progress had been made. I don't know how she kept it together. I was barely able to do so.

R worked hard to get her blood pressure numbers down, which she was able to accomplish. We tried various methods to move the contractions along. This worked to some degree. Elizabeth even made a major emotional and mental breakthrough with R. Additionally, the doctor had us try several different positions in order to move the baby's head. It seemed that we had done all we could. Why wouldn't this baby come out?

About hour 25 or 26 (I don't remember which.), there was talk of moving the labor to the hospital. Kim was concerned about the high blood pressure readings earlier in the process. Elizabeth discovered that the dilation had gone backwards and the baby's head had moved up instead of down.

Things looked bleak. Out worst nightmare of an overly medicalized birth with a possible emergency C-section was now a distinct possibility. R was scared. I was barely able to hold the tears in.

I hastily packed a bag and prepared the car. We were going to the hospital despite all our efforts. After 27 hours of blood, sweat, and tears, our worst fears were coming to fruition.

To be continued...